The 'Love Boat'. Not.

As soon as I started telling friends that I was going on a cruise, they became ecstatic and everyone kept saying "You're gonna have so much fun and will definitely meet someone on the Love Boat!". Umm. NOT exactly. (If you're too young to know what the Love Boat is, here's the Wikipedia entry on Captain Stubing and his crew). Sure, I admit, it'd be great to meet someone onboard. However, what faint cause for optimism I had was quickly dashed on the embarkation lines that Friday afternoon. Scanning the crowds to get a better handle on the demographics of my fellow passengers - retired couple here, another retired couple, a group of retired women (school teachers?) shuffling along casually there...let's see...multi-generational Asian family with bored-looking teens who, I assume from the pouts on their faces, just got dragged into this...sweet couple looking full of hope and enthusiasm (honeymooners, what else?). You get the picture. As they say in industry parlance, most cruise passengers are "newly wed or nearly dead".

Not to say that I didn't make any friends onboard. For one, there's Christy, who was on her honeymoon with her new hubby (they met on Yahoo Personals...wow), and yet I would bump into her almost everday drinking alone at the Cova Cafe. She's fun to talk to, and we compared notes on our horrible online dating experiences. Also, I became pals with Glenn & Marlon (pictured), waiter and bartender, respectively at Cova, both of whom seemed hell-bent on setting me up with every youngish woman who sauntered into the bar.

One night, while at my usual spot at the bar watching the Vivaldi string quartet perform, Glenn whispered to me, "See that woman sitting over there. She's also here every night. Why don't you go and talk to her? Add some sizzle to your cruise." (accompanied by wicked smile). I turned around to look, my curiosity piqued. I told him, "I haven't seen her before. She's here all the time?". "C'mon", Glenn egged me, "go over and approach her". Since I was chatting with Christy at the time, I declined. At one point, Marlon interrupted our conversation, and said "Look over there". I looked, to see both Glenn and the mystery woman waving at me. As soon as Christy left, however, Glenn was in my face, "Go! She's waiting for you!".

Left with no choice, I walked across the room and plopped down on the couch next to Emma. After the introductions, she said "Thanks for the bottle of water you sent". Momentarily puzzled, I replied, "Huh?!". Recovering my composure, I played along and surmised that Glenn had sent her the Evian, saying that it was from me! (A fact that he later confirmed). In addition, Glenn had told Emma that I had observed her sitting there for the past few nights, and thought she would be thirsty, having never ordered anything from the bar in all that time! (No doubt causing dismay among the wait staff). Emma and I soon discovered that we both worked for the same company (in different locations), and for the rest of the cruise we'd meet up at Cova, listen to the string quartet, and talk till the bar closed at 1am. All due to the handiwork of those two crazy guys. Better yet, they didn't charge me for the Evian :-D

P.S. Don't be fooled - the first pic is from my friend Leslie's Caribbean cruise. A belly-flop contest was in progress which according to her was hilarious. None of that stuff on our more sedate Alaskan cruise. Darn.